He said. She
said. Pretty soon, what either of you
said doesn’t matter because all you are doing is fighting.
When you want your ex back when should you go
get relationship counseling?
Relationship counseling is the term for going to a
therapist as a couple to work out differences or get your ex back. You can go to a counselor when you are having
difficulties in your relationship that might cause you to break up or when you
are ready to take the relationship to a new level, or make up.
Relationship counseling helps you to open up new lines of
communication. The therapist can help
you by posing questions, pointing out contradictions, and helping you stay
civil as you work out your differences.
Relationships are about compromise, but compromise is
difficult. Relationship counseling can
be helpful in working out these important compromises that will make your
relationship work.
Relationship counseling only works if both parties are
willing and able to commit to it. If
your motivation is not sincere, you are not likely to get much out of it. While the skill of the therapist is an
important factor in determining how successful the counseling is, even the most
skilled therapist cannot work miracles with couples who are not thoroughly
engaged in the counseling process.
Here is a brief summary of how to get the most out of
relationship therapy.
1.) Acknowledge
there is a problem. Until both parties
are willing to state that there is a problem and that they have the willingness
to work at resolving the problem, there is no hope for relationship therapy to
succeed.
2.) Be
prepared to realize that you are part of the reason there is a problem. Too many times, one partner wants to go into
counseling because they perceive that the other partner has a problem. But a relationship is a two way street. Unless you are willing to find out that you
have contributed to the problem in big ways and small, you will not have a good
therapeutic experience.
3.) Be
willing to change. Acknowledging that
you are part of the problem isn’t on its face enough. You have to be willing to grow and
change. The therapist can help you
realize how to change, but you have to be willing to do the hard work of
implementing the change.
4.) Don’t
expect the therapist to be a magician.
Your therapist can’t waive a magic wand and “fix” your
relationship. Counseling is a mechanism
for you to solve your problems, but it only works if you work. That is, it is a means for you to do the hard
work in your relationship. If you come
into relationship counseling with unrealistic expectations, you are bound to be
dissatisfied with the results.
5.) Know that
it takes time. You won’t solve your
relationship problems in one session or even five. You have to commit to making counseling work
for you, even if it means going for a fair amount of time.
Relationship counseling is a commitment of time, money,
and emotional energy. If your
relationship is worth saving, and you want to mend the heart break, relationship
counseling may be the answer for you.
Still not convinced? Not ready yet? Or want to go at your
own pace?
Consider the Magic Of Making Up - takes
you through a process of truly evaluating your relationship, both positives and
negatives, to see if you can identify what specifically went wrong in your
case. The Magic of Making Up also gives you things to focus on to improve your
own life while you are in the broken up stage. Taking time to make yourself the
best you can be at this stage not only takes your focus away from your
heartbreak, according to the Magic Of Making Up it also helps prepare you to
portray a self-confident mindset to your ex, and also prepares you to move
forward in a positive way regardless of the outcome.
The Magic Of Making Up covers strategies for contacting your ex, the type of meeting to
set up and how to set it up, how to handle a "No" if that is the
response you get on your first try, and perhaps most important how to handle
yourself at the first meeting after a period of break up.
The Magic Of Making Up discusses how to behave and the kinds of things to
discuss at the first meeting, what not to discuss, and offers an interesting
"reconnect technique", which is a simple but loving action you can
take that triggers your ex's subconscious into feeling like they are already
back together in a loving relationship.
Magic Of Making Up
